Editorial: Like it or not, gay marriage is happening

Heavens to Betsy, the gays are getting married in California, hugging and kissing and carrying on just like they’re regular people. Can you sense the palpable damage it’s doing to your marriage? Of course you can’t. Because if a couple guys with shaved forearms want to play house in a loft in San Diego and raise adorable little lap dogs, or, say, a couple gals from rival softball teams are gonna chuck it all and move to a treehouse in the high Sierras, it has absolutely nothing to do with you. Or your marriage. You may not like gays. A lot of people don’t, in theory. You may believe that a marriage is strictly defined as a union between a man and a woman. That’s fine, too – you are still free to believe what you want in this country. And it is precisely because of that freedom that forbidding gay marriage with the force of law is wrong. And this freedom, guaranteed to us all by the Constitution, is what strikes down any argument that can be made against extending the rights and privileges of legal marriage to homosexuals. It’s in the Bible! This is arguable. There are a lot of things in the Bible, including incredible violence, polygamy, brutal punishments and – gasp! – the use of alcohol. If we’re just going to cherry-pick passages that support our views, what’s the point? Also, the Bible, while chock-full of good advice and useful parables, is a Christian text. And since we’re not all Christians, it doesn’t make much sense to place this particular ideology above the others. That’s what they do in some Middle Eastern countries with the Quran. It threatens the sanctity of my marriage! It doesn’t. Infidelity, alcoholism, manic depression, financial stress, lack of communication, physical and mental abuse, sexual incompatibility, a hot new neighbor… these things threaten your marriage. And in case you haven’t noticed: Marriage isn’t doing so hot these days. Just under half of all American marriages end in divorce. People – some of whom follow the example set by celebrities and politicians – don’t take the sacrament seriously anyway. You can get married in your car, or with the entire bridal party dressed as Klingons. You can get married while bungee jumping. You can get an uncontested divorce in an afternoon. I just don’t like it. That’s fine; you don’t have to. The very definition of a pluralistic society is one in which multiple views share equal time. That is what we’re doing here, right? So you don’t believe in gay marriage. Some people don’t believe in eating meat. Others don’t believe in gambling or drinking alcohol or wearing bright colors. None of them have the right to set the national agenda to jibe with their ideologies. So it’s okay to not be okay with gay marriage, just so you understand that it’s happening and there’s not much you can do to stop it. Our advice: If you don’t believe in gay marriage, don’t marry a gay person. YES! Weekly chooses to exercise its right to express editorial opinion in our publication. In fact we cherish it, considering opinion to be a vital component of any publication. The viewpoints expressed represent a consensus of the YES! Weekly editorial staff, achieved through much deliberation and consideration.