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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

by Rob Brezsny

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Is there a big difference between your current job and your beloved career? Do you suffer from the unsettling feeling that your calling hasn’t called you yet? Are you under the impression that your main reason for being here on Earth may reveal itself at some unknown time in the future, but not anytime soon? If you answered no to all those questions, congrats! You are more than halfway toward living a victorious life. But if you answered yes to at least one question, it’s high time to take action. Start by formulating an intention to find out what you need to know in order to deal with the problem more aggressively. The cosmic forces are arrayed in such a way as to reward you for doing so.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): TheIndian guru known as Amma has huggedover 30 million people during her threedecadescareer. I’ve known peoplewho’ve received blessings fromher, and they tell me that she canmagically undo your karmic knotswith her spiritual power, freeing youfrom having to suffer indefinitely forthe bad decisions you made in thepast. Amma rarely does a completeunraveling of all karmic knots inone sitting, however. Your negativeconditioning might be holding youtogether, after all, and a sudden superfixcould cause you to fall apart.That’s the situation I suspect is truefor you right now, Scorpio: You’llbe wise to undo some, but not all, of yourkarmic knots.SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21):The coming week will have something tooffend and agitate everyone — except you.Whines and moans and yelps will ring outacross the land, even as you’re emanatingpoise and aplomb. You may be tempted tobrazenly exploit everyone’s vulnerabilityand seize control of your corner of theworld, but I think that would be shortsightedof you. A better strategy for capitalizing onyour advantage would beto dole out large doses ofmercy, making sure thatthe people who will beimportant to your futuredon’t lose their way.CAPRICORN (Dec.22-Jan. 19): “Thebear must deal with 20obstacles, and each oneof them involves pears,”says the Sufi proverb,“because the bear adores pears.” That’s atwisty truth worth meditating on, Capricorn.I suspect that the gifts coming your waywill bring their own unique problems; thedreams you’re in love with will generatenew dilemmas to solve. By no means doesthis imply that you should avoid acceptingthe gifts or pursuing your dreams. Part of thefun of doing great things is dealing with thechanges they generate!AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Onbehalf of all us non-Aquarians, I’d like toexpress our appreciation for the experimentsyou’ve been performing. Please don’t bediscouraged just because the results thusfar have been inconclusive and left youfeeling a trifle rudderless. We feel confidentthat sooner or later you’ll come up withdiscoveries that will have bottom-line valueto both you and the rest of us. We’d also liketo apologize for the shortsighted and timidtypes among us who are accusing you ofbeing unrealistic or overly optimistic. Pleasekeep trying those novel approaches andmaking those imaginative forays.PISCES (Feb. 19-Mar. 20): Whilereviewing the work of Angelina Jolie in thefilm Taking Lives, AO Scott called her “theflesh-and-blood actress most likely to bemistaken for a computer-generated specialeffect.” I don’t expect you to rival Jolie’sodd talent anytime soon, but I wonder ifmaybe you’ll be seeing a lot of that kind ofstuff in the world around you. Some of thecharacters who will be advancing the plotlinesin your life story may seem to be ableto breathe fire, walk through walls or changethe weather at will. At the very least, you’llwitness phenomena that resemble opticalillusions. My advice: Try to get these exoticoutbreaks to work for you rather than againstyou. Embrace them, don’t fear them.ARIES (Mar. 21-Apr. 19): Is theelectron a wave or a particle? Physicists hadto conduct thousands of experiments to arriveat the definitive answer, which is that it’sboth. In other words, the solution to one ofthe fundamental questions about the natureof reality is a paradox. I think this stronglysuggests that the correct response to manyother riddles about the ultimate truth mightbe two seemingly opposing explanations.Could the Unitarians and Buddhists both beright? Socialists and capitalists? Mystics andscientists? In the upcoming days, Aries, youwill be offered lots of practice in adoptingthis approach as you deal with a personaldilemma that’s very much akin to “Is theelectron a wave or a particle?”TAURUS (Apr. 20-May 20): Haveyou ever mused on the fact that your bodyis actually a kind of furnace? And thatyour whole life depends upon it? Food andoxygen are constantly combusting insideyou, generating fiery energy that fuels yourevery movement, thought and feeling. Thisawareness of fire as a source of vitality, nota destroyer, would be valuable for you tocultivate in the coming days. Your steady,earthy rhythm needs a shot of radiance andluminosity and fervor.GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Severalcouples I know keep lists of the five celebritiesthey’d be allowed to boink if the chanceever presented itself. My friend Jim, forinstance, will incur no karmic repercussionswith his girlfriend Alicia if he ever spendsa night of carnal delight with the followingpeople: Lady Gaga, Sarah Silverman, KarenO, Shakira or Halle Berry. Alicia’s permittedto enjoy liaisons with Johnny Depp, ChrisRock, Marilyn Manson, Jimmy Fallon andPortia de Rossi. I bring this up, Gemini, becauseI believe you’ll soon be the beneficiaryof some extravagant cosmic luck that couldoffer you a close brush with an exotic formof pleasure. This might not exactly take theform of a one-night stand with a famous fox,but it could be almost as extraordinary.CANCER (June 21-July 22): I’mhappy you’re getting back to fundamentalsand shedding pretensions and nourishingyour roots, but I also want to make surethat you don’t get too funky and lowdown.I’d hate to have to be hoisting you up outof the gutter next week, or counseling youon how to cover for the fact that you’vecompromised your own highest standards.So please resist any temptations you mightfeel to descend toward the lowest commondenominator, Cancerian. As you deepenyour center of gravity, make sure you keepyour attitude elevated.’ LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): “I maynot love you,” wrote RR Doister, “but Ican certainly love my fantasy about you.”Personally, I’ve been guilty of embodyingthat attitude toward certain people in my life.There have also been allies to whom I couldhave said, “I do love you, although I love myfantasy about you a little more.” And it haseven been the case on numerous occasionsthat I’ve been proud to declare, “I love youeven more than I love my fantasy aboutyou.” What about you, Leo? Where doyou stand on the issue? This is an excellenttime to get on the righteous side of the greatdivide, which is to say: Adore your specialpeople for who they really are more than foryour fantasies about them.VIRGO (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22): Ina puckish fantasy, the poet Linh Dinhimagined a hypothetical scenario in whichit would be uncool to be too cool. “In aneffort to inject more pep and resolve into itslethargic citizens,” he waxed with propheticlonging, “the government is mandating theuse of an exclamation mark at the end ofeach sentence, spoken or written. ‘It lookslike rain!’ for example, or ‘I must sleep!’” Isuggest that you take his vision, Virgo, andturn it into reality for the immediate future!You would really benefit from getting moreexcited than usual! Who knows, maybe asimple thing like imagining every one ofyour sentences ending with an exclamationmark could make your whole being morethrillable!

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