Ten Best: Easy-sounding classes

by Chris Lowrance

Religious Studies 100: Myth, Dream, Metaphor

Ah, the eternal quest for the easy A. Even the best of students needs a bit of GPA padding on occasion, something to slip in between the Advanced Aerodynamics Lab II’s and Intensive Deconstruction of the Works of James Joyce’s. A snoozer, with a topic vague enough to BS through and a class size large enough to make mandatory attendance unenforceable. This Guilford College course sounds like it could fit the bill -for starters, what the hell is it even about? However, a word to the wise: all it takes is one bitter professor, peeved about having to teach a classroom full of dipshits like you, to turn an easy A into a semester-long hell of blue-book-filling.

BCN 226: Masterpieces of Television Drama

This little beauty, however, comes with a first-hand recommendation. Attending UNCG? Planning to spend all semester sitting in your dorm eating Fritos and watching reruns of “Six Feet Under?” Would you like class credit for doing so? Life is good.

UNS 201: The Sophomore Experience

UNCG’s “University Studies” program is a piece of existential perfection. The first, UNS 101, is an entire class devoted to touring the library, hearing campus legends and putting together presentations about the school’s founder who famously died of too much lunch. This second installment, which would presumably have sophomores studying the sophomore experience, is almost too meta for us to make a joke about it, but we just did.

OSH 205: Sprinklers and Auto Alarms

After reading the NC A&T University course catalogue, we can safely say this is a course about sprinklers and auto alarms.

ART 301: Art in the Elementary School

Hey, remember how your third grade teacher had you all make Mother’s Day presents out of macaroni and Popsicle sticks? She went to college for that. Wake Forest and any school with an art education program will teach you how to finger-paint, tie things together with yarn and glue dry goods to construction paper. The difference between this time and third grade? A few hundred dollars.

MUS 116: Cabaret

Something tells us this High Point U offering isn’t nearly as cool as we’re imagining. And the professor probably looks nothing like Liza Minnelli in the 1976 film. Still, if we’re “Willkommen,” “Maybe This Time” we’d pay the “Money, Money” for this class.

SOC 3346: Human Sexuality

The interest and quality of a human sexuality course depends greatly on the instructor. Also, your ability not to giggle incessantly at words like “vulva.” According to Winston-Salem State’s course catalogue, “Myth, foibles and current research will be intensively reviewed.” Huh huh huh… “foibles.”

PED 2107 Water Sports

“So what are you taking this year?”

“Water sports.”

Long, uncomfortable silence.

“You know, like water polo?”

“Ohhh, okay… I thought… okay, good! Good for you. That’s great, honey.”

CNS 102: Career Planning

How to plan your career! This half-semester-long Wake Forest offering confuses us a little. You’re already at Wake Forest, right? Isn’t the “plan” to either go pro as a junior or else have Dad start a company for you to run?

EDU 392: Writing for Public Relations and Advertising

Another Wake Forest class, this one about what young journalists refer to as “The Dark Side,” and older journalists as “the job I’m quitting to go do.” Still, every time you see that brain-numbingly dumb commercial for the 300th time, just remember: It took a team of people with expensive degrees to write that.