The scariest thing about Halloween is not the whole “spooky” vibe that pervades — I mean, who’s scared of some woman dressed as a slutty vampire? And it’s not the prospect of some teenagers vandalizing my house, because I’ve learned that if you hose the eggs off early the next morning they won’t destroy your siding. No, what scares me is all the candy I’m about to eat. M&Ms, Tootsie Rolls, mini Snickers bars, Blow Pops, Hershey’s Kisses, Mary Janes, Smarties, Peppermint Patties. If I get the chance, I’m gonna shotgun some Pixy Sticks and chase ’em with a handful of Sugar Babies. At any rate…. The culinary scene begins Wednesday night at Greensboro’s Earth Fare, where a vegan cooking class, Flavors of Fall, will take place at 6:30 p.m., featuring pumpkin and squash recipes. This one’s a freebie, and there will be tasting. Speaking of tasting, that same night the Press Wine CafÃ© in Greensboro’s Southside neighborhood holds a German beer tasting at 7:30 p.m. with samples of Schneider Weiss, Einbecker, Ur Bock, Bitburger Kostritzer, St. Michaelsburg Keller and Aventinus Eisbock. Dinner will consist of pork schnitzel, red cabbage and potato dumplings with gravy. Call the restaurant at 336.333.3190 or see the site, www.thepresswinecafe.com, for reservations. And over in the Camel City, also on Wednesday, 6th & Vine holds a Dinner and a Movie event featuring The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Meatloaf, anyone? Friday is, of course, Halloween. But if you’re not out begging the neighbors for candy, you might want to head back to the Press for its Hallowine party with wine specials, a costume contest and music by our pal Evan Olson. On Saturday, Earth Fare begins its holiday wreath sale. Jump over to Monday, and another wine event, this time a wine tasting at Muse Restaurant & Wine Bar in Greensboro. Apparently they hold one every Monday evening — Who knew? It is also worth noting that Muse has a seasonal menu with some intriguing items. I’m curious about the portobello and crabmeat Carpetbagger, the pierogies and the rack of Colorado lamb. Check it out for yourself at the website, www.restaurantmuse.com. Greensboro’s Lucky 32 (www.lucky32.com) also has a fall menu that makes me curious: tasso onion dip, chicken livers with corn macque choux, persimmon-glazed mahimahi, fried sweet-potato pie. Wow. That’s my man Chef Jay Pierce at work over there, with this Creole-inspired autumn offering. And hey: Is anybody else here freezing? I’m freezing. It’s going to be a long, cold winter. I can feel it in my bones. Thank god for whiskey, and the steam room at the YMCA.